Thanks for Listening
Published by Derek under Personal on October 6, 2009I just wanted to thank one of my readers… who until today I had no idea read my blog. I actually started to wonder if anybody reads this thing… and my question was answered with compassion.
You really made me feel comforted. Thank you! I have been feeling a bit better about the whole alienation thing. I spent that past two or three weeks letting myself go free from my need to be completely productive. I spent days doing nothing but enjoying myself however that was for the day. Most of the time I wouldn’t even leave my house. And over that time I found out that I was missing something that made me feel whole. It was like an experiment into what my being craves. And no matter what I did I always felt the same… like I should be doing more with my life. So even if I end up “letting my friends down” I think it will be for the better. Because I understand now that my expectations and theirs are only that… expectations. There’s nothing I can do to change how they feel and react to the path I lead. I can only educate them on who I am and why… whether they like it or not.
I’m glad to know that there are people who read my blog that barely know me but feel enough compassion to tell me that everything is going to be okay. It’s already happened twice and both times I never would have expected it. Every time I find out someone has read my blog I feel better knowing that there are people who are listening… because in the real world I feel as though I am far from the norm… far enough so that my ideas just make me sound crazy. All I want is to live my life without guilt and with passion for life. I care about my actions and how they influence the world around me. I do believe that we create the world starting with the first thought we wake up with. I would rather see the world with an ideal perspective than one of pessimism and what people call “reality”. This is my reality… a world of peace and love is my vision… and I see it becoming more and more prevalent with every passing day.
Thank you again… you know who you are.
Peace and Love
I just wanted to tell you that I feel like whoever is judging you or making you feel guilty for being you, honestly isn’t a friend. A friend is someone who accepts you for who you are and loves you for it regardless. Just because you do things that may not be the norm doesn’t mean they are wrong and you should stop doing them. I won’t assume to know what’s going on between you and your friends or how they feel but from reading what you’ve written it doesn’t seem to me that you are alienating yourself because of your beliefs. It seems clear to me that they are alienating you due to your beliefs. I may not agree with everything you stand for but you have a right to stand for it and you shouldn’t ever feel guilty or outcasted because of it. I think you’re a wonderful person with a refreshing view on life. I don’t have to agree with every little thing you believe in but as someone who considers you a friend, I believe the way you live your life is a good thing. It is a good thing to see someone with such strong, unwavering convictions. There are no bad intentions or outcomes in the things that you do, and if anyone is effected by them, it is for the better. If everyone practiced what they preached like you do the world would be a better place. I know that whoever is criticizing you for doing the things you do may have a greater effect on you because they are someone you consider a friend but I know you’ll never let someone else’s opinion of you change who you are. All you can do is be you and the people who truly care about you won’t be “let down” by that. I love you.
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