My whole entire life is changing more and more every day. I don’t know where I’m headed or how I’m getting there. I certainly can’t believe where I am now and how wonderful my life has been up until this point. All I know is that I am happy to be alive and to have the knowledge I’ve acquired (as well as the other million blessings in my life).
I am left in this moment feeling the need to express all that I have in my heart. I feel as though the connections we make with each other are vital for our happiness and well-being. I don’t know how we will all reconnect and be at peace once more, but I know without a doubt that love is the only truth. Love is the only guide we can trust. If we only could all learn to love, we might find ourselves better off than we ever could have imagined.
I wanted to post this music video of Brett Dennen’s song “Ain’t No Reason”. It speaks truth. Help spread the love by sharing this with someone.
I came home with Bonnie who was kind enough to pick me up from work so I wouldn’t have to ride in the rain. I love her more than words can say. I decided to spend the evening in watching “Juno” and crocheting. Before I started my evening, I invited my good friend Jeff over for dinner and a movie. The movie didn’t happen and the dinner was reheated, but that isn’t why I’m writing this post. I wanted to reflect a bit more on the topic of circumstances.
I have recently been focusing my life into a very small variety of circumstances. I have been minimizing the amount of time spent with anyone other than Bonnie and Nathan as well as spending very little time by myself. It wasn’t until this evening that I realized I have neglected to see the outcomes of my previous choices that are no longer visible due to the fact that I have honed my life down to practically nothing. Meaning I have been unable to learn the greater virtues of life through all the challenges and circumstances that I have shut out.
I think what I am trying to say is that we have to make every moment count. We have the opportunity every second to listen and learn all there is in life. It may seem like nothing, but when someone speaks to you it can mean the world.
Jeff helped me realize this in a way that didn’t make sense until now. What he taught me is not important, what is important is the lesson:
I was given the recording for the song I wrote with Chelsea Taylor. She gave me the words and laid down an a cappella vocal track for me to write the music off of. I thought the piece was a great success for one take on both our parts. enjoy.
Published by Derek under Personal on
February 20, 2008
I thought I should say that I do not really enjoy having my hair cut off prematurely during the winter season. I will miss it until next fall/winter. But what I really wanted to say pertains to my secret youtube life.
I subscribed to youtube only to have an outlet for allowing people to see various videos that I make for my blog. I have posted 11 videos 3 of which were of my haircut. Most of my videos have only been viewed 20-70 times (except my walden pond video which was viewed 156 times). All of those videos have been on youtube for about 3-6 months. The interesting part of all this is my newest video, which has only been online for 24 hours, has been viewed 363 times and has one comment! I am shocked, but I guess that hair is a much more popular topic than my other videos.
Thursday: Nathan baked me the most delicious strawberry cheesecake.
Friday: I Finished Bonnie’s birthday present and presented it to her a day early.
Saturday: I went to a private chamber music performance by the Chiara String Quartet.
Sunday: I worked… ALL day… 8-12 and 3-11…
Monday: Woke up next to Nathan and spent the day recording a rough recording of “In my Arms” with Chelsea. She only needed the piano so she could record the vocals in her friends sound studio. When I get the final recording I will post it.
At the end of the day I go to sleep thinking about tomorrow and I find myself caught up in the future. In the morning I am thinking about the day ahead. During breakfast I think about lunch and dinner. Even though my general tendency is to think of the future I also find myself thinking in the past. Either way both are intangible and non-existent. Neither are real. The only reality is right now: This very moment.
Whether you believe it or not, you can only change is what is happening in your life right now this very second…no this second…no this second. The moment is there for the taking. You can do with it what you like. You could read, meditate, walk, sit, eat, sing, dance, make a friend/enemy, have a baby, feed the homeless, shelter the homeless, teach, give, love, appreciate, and yes I could go on for pages. Whatever it is you do and you’ve only this endless moment to do it.
I bring this up because I recently have been thinking too much about the future. I was doing really well with my position here and now, but now I am getting excited about the changes that are happening. I want to rush into them, like the aries I am but I know I am just failing to see what’s in front of my eyes and what will make tomorrow possible. I am failing to make the change I want to have available to me in the future and I fear that the majority of people are also making the same mistake, but in a more viral way.
When I say we can make the moment whatever we want, I mean we can manifest whatever we want. Our actions and our thoughts are shaping our world (yes thoughts are that powerful). If you think enough about one thing it’s bound to happen, but not necessarily the way you want them too. Imagine a negative thought you might be harboring. The more you harbor that thought the more reality you give it. The more you will bring that picture into your vision. On the other side think of a thought that is more productive in nature. The more you energize that thought, the more it becomes present in your life. Whether you are aware of it or not your thoughts and actions matter and will manifest.
You can believe me or not, but I think that the general population has decided with-out-a-doubt that we can not change the circumstances of our lives (not that it needs to change, because everything right now is the way it needs to be). Or that we can not make the world a peaceful place. Or that we can not raise up the victims of suppression into the awareness of those who do not care to help. Or even that we can make change on any global level. I think otherwise because it is thoughts like these that suffocate the potential in our world. These thoughts do not have any potential they only have their single negative reality.
We can change the world however we choose. We all have the power, whether great or small. We can make change. It can be as simple as a smile (I actually think smiles are a great way to affect the world around us).
But there’s only one way to do it. Stay present! Stay in the moment. Don’t lose your focus to dwell in the past or fantasize about your future. Exist fully here and now. Then make your choice!
I have started writing another song. I call it Appreciation. I still need to keep practicing my guitar skills, but in time I may record it again and make a final version. Enjoy.
I was trying to record “All My Life” again but because I’m sick I ran out of energy. I will have it recorded again soon. I promise. Keep looking for it.
Two words I find myself not saying enough. Thank you to all of you in the world. Thank you to those who challenge me to be a better person. Thank you to those who validate the purpose. Thank you to my enemies. Thank you to my friends.
I love you all from the bottom of my heart and my appreciation flows to you like the endless ocean tides. You are all the most wonderful coauthors of this existence and I couldn’t have asked for a better life than this.
Here’s another video of the “happening” courtesy of Chris Hassan. You can see me reading a poem I wrote and a brief moment me playing guitar overdubbed with some other person music. Thanks Chris, I love the publicity!
The moment is there for the taking. You can do with it what you like. You could read, meditate, walk, sit, eat, sing, dance, make a friend/enemy, have a baby, feed the homeless, shelter the homeless, teach, give, love, appreciate, and yes I could go on for pages. Whatever it is you do and you’ve only this endless moment to do it.